that one of the hardest things to find in this world is a friend

It has been said before, that one of the hardest
things to find in this world is a friend; the easiest is an enemy.
Friends are bound by common ties, a kinship, a shared experience,
interest or time. A friend is another person you have high regard for
and trust.

A spouse on the other hand in generally described
by wiki as a partner in a marriage. In jest, a spouse can be referred
to as the “bitter half”. Web research shows in predominantly Christian
countries that the divorce rate 17% for Spain is, in Italy it is 12%
and the US a staggering 43%. The Philippines
on the other hand does not allow divorce. But www.attyatwork.com and
www.inquirer.net says that by 2007 the number of applicants for
annulment of marriage reached 7,753.

As some discussion forums theorize if divorce was allowed in the Philippines
that we would go by the way of the US statistics since we live very
highly exposed to their particular culture. In any case, the point
being made is that the rate of failure is alarming.

Measures
for intervention for failing marriages consists of a gamut programs of
consultants, doctors, therapists, programs and at times priests and
nuns. Still not enough it seems.

My take on it is that making
a marriage work will always be difficult. Making a life and raising
children can be the greatest burden or best gift in life and in my
belief that the best intervention would be to find a friend in your
betrothed. My favored definition of a friend is someone who knows
everything about you but still likes you.

People marry for many
reasons, some for love, some for security and some for sheer
desperation. Once you’re in it and you find yourself wanting more then
maybe you can start making your partner into a friend. The ingredients
are actually already there, you just have to mix it.

www.improvingyourworld.com
warns that this will take time and energy. Essentially it will take
“quality” time. The suggestion is not to go on a date since that only
improves your love life. To make a best friend there should be lots of
laughter blended with a bit of excitement served on a plate of common
interests. That what friends do. Even in the uncanniest of matches a
common ground can still be found.

A daily ritual of light
heartedness should follow this up. Save a few minutes in a day for that
sought out laughter. Find a fun time.

The next method is to
avoid stressful situations. Bickering never solved anything and it
never will. Avoid confrontations and arguments that can cause any
further disagreements.

www.associatedcontent.com adds to this
with the advice to stop insulting your spouse to your friends. A common
practice when messing around with the boys, or talking shop with the
girls. This is something you would not do with your posse so don’t
speak wrongly about your spouse and the same mantle of camaraderie will
ensue.

Talking as a friend also will help. If you can talk about
the silliest of things with your pals for hours then it should be quite
easy to treat your spouse with the same courtesy.

Finally, be
the greatest cheerleader. Friends do that for friends and never stop.
More often than not, the romance dies and the sexual drive slows down
and the common interplay of communication signals becomes shrugs and
stares.

So that’s it. Simplicity can be a useful tool in
rebinding ties with use the fundamentals of friendship. It may be hard
to accept at first, but always remember that when the time comes that
you think that your spouse has become unfamiliar to you then try to
make a friend by saying a simple hello.